Mr & Mrs Bodgit

I honestly don’t know where it all went so wrong. OH and myself came and looked at our house on more than one occasion before OH signed on the dotted line….. and yet we failed to realise we have bought the house from Mr & Mrs Bodgit (identities have been changed to protect the stupid!)

We have moved into a lovely new village, and as this is our first house together so everything should be lovely, and it is, well it was until we looked closer…

Let’s start with the outside of the house, as you look up our driveway we have a lovely semi-detatched cottage, white walls, red front door, and two ornate lights on either side of the front porch… however only one of those lovely ornate lights are plugged into the mains, the other one it would appear is just for show.

Now let me take you through my front door, my lovely red front door, and into the small front porch. Now be careful or the door will bang on the inside of our vestibule, no wait a miunte it’s ok the lovely people we have bought the house from have put a door stop on the wall to stop it from banging…oh wait a minute… there measurements were slightly out and the door when fully open misses the stop by a good few inches!!!

You then walk out of the small entrance porch into the lounge. It spans the whole front of the house, there is a cute gas fire and two gorgeous bay windows.

However a closer look around the lounge makes you slightly suspicious that Mr & Mrs Bodgit had shares in a plastic wire covering company as it is everywhere.  The have laid plastic track around every window and half way up every wall.

Moving away from the plastic wire we see the first of our five fuse boxes, two holes for the TV aerial and a telephone cable that they have decided to run from the upstairs bedroom down into the lounge, but rather than putting it discreetly into the corner of the room the cable runs down the middle of one of the walls!

I do not know how or why we did not notice this when we first looked round this house!!

BSEplate

When do you become an Aunty/Uncle?

I know, I can hear you now – when your sister/brother has a baby, thank you very much, moving on to the next blog…..
I am an Auntie to two, soon to be three, little girls. Whenever they greet me or talk about me I am referred to as Auntie… the problem is I am not.

They are my cousins kids.  My cousin doesn’t have any siblings, and we grew up around the corner from each other and so growing up he was more of a brother than a cousin. When he and his fiancée had their first girl, we were still very close and although my cousin’s partner’s family (keeping up?) complained that we shouldn’t be, me and my sister became Baby girl no. 1’s Aunties.

Enter Baby girl no. 2, and although we don’t see as much of them as we did things are still good so once again we became Aunties.

However since Baby girl no. 2 there have been some small fallings out, and then a much bigger one when the idiot fiancée took to Facebook to slag off my dad so we are no longer as close as we used to be.

As well as these small arguments, there has been some massive changes in my life in between the arrive of Baby girl no. 2 and the soon to be with us Baby no. 3 mainly I am now living with OH and with his unwillingness to get married again this is about as committed as the two of us are going to get. So does he now become an Uncle?

When I got the phone call to tell me Baby no. 3 was on her/his way I didn’t immediately grab the phone to tell him. In fact I didn’t tell him until I realised that my sister had told her boyfriend, manly because I thought he wouldn’t care. However, this got even more cogs turning. We are as committed to each other as we will get, doesn’t this mean that my family is now his family and vice versa?

Or do you only become an Uncle when married? That was my sisters point when I discussed this with her.

OH has told his nephews they can call me Aunty, which resulted in a question from them of “why are you getting married?” silence from the adult family members and a quick diversion of conversation by OH. His best friends kids have started to call me aunty so why am I holding back on making him an Uncle? Is it even up to me?

I am sure it wasn’t like this in fairy tales! Whatever happened to boy meets girl, they fall in love, get married and ride off into the sunset on a white horse!

 

auntie

Travel Insurance

I know it may not always sound like it, but I know I am lucky to be sharing my life with OH.

He has his good moments as well as his bad. I have always wanted a Christmas wreath on my front door and so earlier this week he stood in a queue for over an hour so that he could surprise me with one. The other day I was running low on petrol and happened to mention it to him and he turned up at work with a can of gas to fill my car so I could get home, and I have lost count at the number of times he has turned up at work with my lunch which I have left on the counter top as I ran out of the door late.

However, sometimes I could swing for him!

I was on the phone last night to my travel insurance provider looking to renew my insurance which runs out today. He overheard the conversation I was having about why the actual price was £100 more expensive than the quote they had sent me now I was on the phone to them. He convinced me to hang up and promised he would sort it. I did explain to him before I hung up that I had problems due to the DVT I have had in my leg, that it took me a lot of time to find this company… he promised he would look after it and muttered the immortal lines “trust me!”

When I woke up this morning, I was a little annoyed that I listened to him, but as he was going to sort it… however my feelings changes when in the mists of an argument about plastic utensils in a non-stick pan he then decides to ask me why don’t I spend my lunch break looking for travel insurance companies!!!!

 

WTF

It’s not nagging – I am just reminding you for the 100th time!

Since moving in with OH he has complained multiple times that I have started to nag. I am aware that I have started to nag, which I really hate, but I do and will continue to argue that it isn’t all my fault and most some of the reason for my nagging can be firmly placed on his shoulders.

For example over the last 12 hours (and please do bear in mind we were asleep for most of that time)

The Loo seat:
Last night when getting in to bed I ‘nagged’ about him leaving the toilet seat up. I would not have had to mention the toilet seat had it not been for the fact that five minutes before getting into bed I had gone to the loo and fallen in. Resulting not only in a wet back and legs but what I think is going to be a pretty awful bruise tomorrow.

His concern was a little off the mark when he simply pointed out “you should have seen the loo seat was up and put it down” All I am asking for him to put the loo seat back where it was when he first used it, is a little consideration too much to ask for?

Metal utensils in non-stick pans:
Now this little gem I learnt the hard way. It was my first night of Uni and I was desperate to make a good impression on my new house mates. I was worried they would judge me for leaving a mucky pan to soak on the side, and so I cleaned my non-stick, brand new pan with a scouring pad. Thus ending its non-stick life.

Now OH has a thing against plastic utensils. He loves metal utensils. He thinks they look better than their inferior plastic counterparts and has grudgingly accepted my plastic ones in the house so long as they are not left out on show.

This morning I came down to find a metal spoon and scratches inside my new rice cooker,. Yes it’s not ours it is something I have bought myself, out of my money, despite (and this is the REALLY annoying bit) the plastic spatula that came with rice cooker sitting clean on the side.

We still aren’t talking to each other!

So my new year’s resolution for this year …… OH I promise I will stop nagging….. if you promise to stop giving me things to nag about!!!!!

calm

I’m worried my family are trying to kill OH

You may get the feeling by now that I can sometimes over react. I know shocker. However I am going to share with you a concern that I have had for at least two days now…. and that is… maybe… my family are trying to kill OH!

I know sometimes I say through gritted teeth I am going to kill him, but despite him being a grumpy, stubborn pain in the ass I really do love him. However….

OH is mildly allergic to nuts. Hence me treating myself to nuts on his credit card when he was being an ass.

However it would appear no matter how many times I tell my grandparents about his allergy they forget… or chose to forget – you chose! They have now tried to feed OH nuts on three separate occasions, the last of which took the form of an innocent Christmas pudding which my grandparents sent me home with after dropping in their Christmas presents the other weekend. Luckily I had suspicions (of the included nuts, not the murderous tendency) and so I have had to eat all the puddings myself. The things we have to do for the people we love right?!

However, while focusing on my grandparent’s attempts to off OH I have overlooked other members of my family and now it would seem my grandparents have enlisted the help of my Aunty. She bought OH some lovely patterned socks for Christmas, which OH wore with pride on Boxing Day morning… before falling down half the stairs sometime after lunch!

I heard a bang but being with his family I didn’t got to explore and bless him he spent a good 10 minutes on the floor at the bottom of the stairs.

You will be pleased to hear that he escaped without any broken bones, although he did hurt his foot and it took a few hours for feeling to return to all his fingers, but for now all is well. Until my family try again that is 😉

Superman-Socks_grande